Ok, there are some things that tick me off on Twitter. Not enough that I lose my temper and throw stuff but, enough that I can move my fingers in a typey typey way to tell you about it.
This is how I shrink filter the growing list of people I follow..
1. if you send an autoDM with a link to your site
Take the above picture (please, take it and throw it away!). How is it these people have 4000+ followers with autoDM’s like this? do they work? oh god I hope not.
2. if you tell me anything about your god
This is a thing I like about twitter. There’s no religious tweets in my stream, for the life of me I can’t see how 140 characters could get someone to join your god. The religious can tweet to each other all day long but how many people of a different god will continue to listen?
3. if you spurt many many messages in one go so you dominate my column
I know you must be on an interesting site or going through some great links but, slow down! by the time I have checked out the first link. The public timeline has evolved more messages and I lose the rest!
4. if you use viral pyramid follow things
What’s the matter with you? will you hand over your twitter username and password to just any old whacko who promises you a squillion followers? take a second and think about it…
5. if you use number 4 as your first autoDM when I follow you
die die die.
6. if you use big bad swear words too frequently
I get it, I’m an adult and I swear so I understand when things need an expletive or two but not when it’s every second f***ing word!
7. if you have 1 update and it’s a link to your site
Hey! I has got url, an I has got twitter. I can add thems up and gets traffic!
fewls
8. if you spell reely baldly
it’s you’re funny not, your funny.
my funny what?
Well, that’s not bad! only 8 things. I could go on all day listing things about instant messengers!
What gets your goat on twitter?
Nice! Funny, short, witty and sweet. One thing that constantly ticks me off is the “your” and “you’re” confusion – last time when I followed someone I got a DM which read “Your looking hot today.” I nearly fell of my chair, not because of the comment but rather the horribly grammar
but I did gave me a good chuckle!
I have to agree with you that Twitter has little space for religious talks? So far I’ve never seen a single tweet about it and wish people could keep it that way – religion is one’s own belief, he/she should keep it to himself (and not mass DM people to convert… that’s what one of my friend did. In the end I blocked him… both on Twitter and in real life, phone calls that is).
Have a great weekend!
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Twitter: psychicgeek
I don’t follow people just because they follow me. I look to see if their tweets aren’t annoying. I never get those auto DM things. But then I only have about 100 followers. Not bad for the small amount of time I spend there.
witchypoo´s last blog post..Saucy Man
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Twitter: indblog
You should follow someone called skinnyjeans if you want to be reminded every couple of minutes to ‘hydrate your body’ and be looked down on for not being a fitness freak like her.
Dean Saliba´s last blog post..Beat The Financial Crisis With Coupons!
teddy: have a great weekend too, thanks for the feedback
witchypoo: mostly I filter before I follow but I follow quite a few from recommendations or search terms so they can throw surprises sometimes.
dean: it’s so easy to unfollow someone when that happens and it’s less painful than doing it on facebook or msn!
Andy Bailey´s last blog post..The UnMom – Featured Site
Great post Andy. You have articulated what a lot of people feel. My question is simply this. Why bother to twitter at all?
Nicole Price´s last blog post..Baby Shower Gift Ideas
This stuff is so true. I’ve pretty much started to ignore DMs now, I can tell from a quick glance that it’s just another auto DM. Same thing with the update spammers, very annoying but part of me thinks this might just be an issue with twitter where it buffers a few of the user’s updates and dumps them all at once.
Blog Income Report´s last blog post..January Traffic Analysis
nicole: it’s a question I asked before I used it. I spend a lot of time at the computer and so I get to follow the stream in the background. I’ve found the whole place to be massively useful for finding answers to questions and getting an opinion.
bir: I think that more people should post about autodms , it’s ‘orrible!
Andy Bailey´s last blog post..The UnMom – Featured Site
no. 3 gets my goat. i can really tolerate almost anything on twitter – cause i can get crazy myself – and i have only had to unfollow one person because my whole grid was tweets about their blog. that’s like what, 12-15 tweets. they were drowning out my other people. not a fan of a lot of cursing either.
Natural´s last blog post..Answer: A River Runs Through It
I see less of it happening now and once experienced myself seeing a whole lot in one go when my twitterberry had lag for some photos and they all got caught up at once.
mostly, even though i sound like a twitter whiner, I love having it occupy my second monitor. It’s like watching the matrix in code (on an 8bit machine)
oh and your post about a river runs through it wasn’t what I was expecting when I clicked your link!
Twitter: lottomad
Yo Andy have you moved up north yet???
I must say I am probably the only one on the planet that fails to understand the point of twitter, whats the point? Its just a big status update thingy, is this just not getting all a bit sad now?
dave t´s last blog post..EuroMillions update
dave: I’m up there next week! twitter is one of those things that you don’t get until you got it. like having a boat or playing golf.
I’ve killed my original account. I’ll. reup when I can do it right, from the start.
Dennis Edell´s last blog post..Your Thoughts Are Wanted On My Other Two Blogs
Twitter: lottomad
Ah well Andy, knowning that I am normally behind you and Tristan in terms of techie stuff, I will probably “get it” in 2011.
I will be up at Tristans again soon, so if your take away is open by then, will pop in and say hi, its been a while.
dave t´s last blog post..Bored bored bored
dennis: probably a good idea, scrap it and start again fresh with the right game plan
dave: keep at it, you’ll see how useful it is. I’ve seen a few of the old MLM’ers on there but all they can seem to provide are links to viral crap and an occasional, “I’m at the pc” lol.
Andy Bailey´s last blog post..how to change your js-kit colour scheme for blogger CommentLuv
Ha! I aim to be unconnected on Twitter. Please don’t follow me. …..
Sharon´s last blog post..Old Cookbooks: Trash or Treasure? Tasty Titles Worth Finding and Keeping.
i havent even joined twitter yet. i’m worried of joinning something that will take more of my time up.
dave so´s last blog post..Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen Official HD Movie Trailer #2 NEW!
I totally agree with all your comments. Twitter is a great way to build relationships and get to know people in real time and I’ve met some really great people through Twitter. However there does seem to be more and more mlm spammers joining Twitter, adding 2,000 followers in one go and setting up their auto dm’s to help people achieve never ending youth or $1m with 5 mins work just click here. I wonder about their understanding of Twitter as in one click they are unfollowed and never heard of again – best feature of Twitter!
Quality over quantity will win every time on Twitter.
Lesley Johnston´s last blog post..How To Create Your Twitter Profile
LOL. This is a nice post! I agree with you on number 3. Some of these people love to retweet so much, I am afraid he doesn’t has his own mind or any stand on anything. Hurmm.. That’s weird~
bluecrystaldude´s last blog post..It’s a New Day
Hi Andy,
I’m still new at this Twit…errr tweet thing. Obviously some really see it as a game – all those machines must have eaten up many of them. Over a hundred of whom I “followed” simply vanished – banned by Twitter.
“…….” right, no cursing – but I do get loads of “join my church” Tweets – most annoying. Give plain old nature any day; even if it’s a blizzard in minus 20c.
How does one sit and tweet all day once every 2 minutes? This young lady on tweeter did that until I “untweeted” her.
It’s amazing, all those that annoy and some online “gurus” are still doing them. One very obvious one is that one update with his URL to his site.
And try tweeting people that work in a bank – they don’t or at least won’t tell you they work in a bank. I get e-mails instead of posts on my blog – something about being used to corporate secrecy.
Anyway, looking forward to more of your posts – got here from a Blog Success link.
Stephen Chua´s last blog post..China Bankrolling USA
Andy, great list! #3 & #7 get my goat. Haven’t experienced the “God” one yet and hope I never do!
I visit blogs/sites as I can and as often as possible, tweet the follower, post a link to a page or a good blog post with a compliment. Only ONCE did anyone actually go to my site and reciprocate with a link. Of course, everyone replies with some sort of “thank you for linking to my site.” I feel that Twitter tends to bring out our “inner narcissist” at times and we don’t even realize it.
And even if somone has a gadzillion followers, if they’re not having conversations with others that show up in their stream, they are essentially useless (unless they’re some sort of internet/biz/whatever guru who’s just worth following). Your tweets will never be exposed to their followers…and that’s the whole point, no?
The Rule 5,Why?
What’s wrong with number 4?
Hihihihihihihiii
Some really good tips here. And I am afraid that I have done at least one of these don’t-do-this things…. But I will try to not do those mistakes anymore 
IngaOz´s last blog post..Do You Use Splash Pages?
another great post twitter is a good source to meet new people though
Perfect Many people whom i follow will do the same thing they just send me an auto message with there link which some times irritates me and its just waste to follow them
-Sri
Thanks for the helpful advice
These are all the reasons I won’t follow somone on Twitter as well. You can @optmeout if you do not like Auto DM’s.. it is a preference.. not all are bad, but still seems impersonal!
lol…you really make me laugh on the spelling uupppsss spelling thing…Funny and informative. This is the easiest way to explain things with humor involve.
Great points Andy, you have collected some worse things that should not be there in the system otherwise people will start dying like any thing.
For me the “re tweet” thing is most annoying.
Well I don’t claim to be the sharpest tool in shed. I auto follow and give people chance to prove themselves and then trim. I am rotten at keyboard so I overlook spelling junk. I have poeple on that are total opposite of me in religion and politics.
I love people so have tried one or two of those builder things. … worthless wasters of time. It faster to do it my way if you like people.
All that said I loved your list of annoyances. I totally agree and I am vowing to trim my list – just for the sake of my other good followers not having to see 5 million updates from mr. affiliate I’ll make you rich person (who only has 30 friends anyway ).
Thanks for great post
A ~
Alrady´s last blog post..For Each Follower – end world hunger – $1.00